You know when you feel like you’ve hit the mommy jackpot? It’s the day when the kids are happy (and behaving), your jeans fit, you’ve crossed a long list errands off your list, laundry is folded (and put away), you had a chance to make a some healthy homemade meals (which everyone ate), and you even got to peruse the headlines on the newspaper (on the day it was delivered). Oh, and somewhere in those 24 hours, you squeezed in a little “me time”, whether it was as simple as having an uninterrupted phone conversation or as lavish as booking a sitter for lunch out with a girlfriend. Yeah, well, yesterday was kind of the polar opposite for me. Don’t get me wrong, I am thankful for each and every day I get to stay home with my boys. But sometimes I get muddled in the juggling act of motherhood. So Annie, this entry is for you.
Last week, my dear friend Annie sent me an email saying how much she likes this bog but asking “how do you do it all and make it look so easy…stay so balanced”.
Fast forward to this morning when my older son gave me a handmade card. The card reads:
“107 TO DIY TO MOM HAPPE MUTRS DAY I LOVE YOU DIS WILL TELL YOU HAW MUCH I LOVE YOU” [then there is a chart at the bottom] “NODE: 0…MACING BREKFAS: 2…LEXEO: 5…BING NOS: 100”
For those not versed in reading phonetically, I got a total of 107 points today and this is how the points broke down: 0 points for being naughty (which he defined as yelling at him), 2 points for making breakfast, 5 points for playing a game with him, and 100 points for being nice. There it is. I have been doing too much yelling. Now if that isn’t enough to make you take a step back and evaluate what you’re doing right and what is causing stress in your life, I am not sure what is?
Though I didn’t have time to actually put pen to paper until now, I was going to email Annie back and then I decided that writing an entry here might actually be more helpful/interesting to our broader group of friends who reads this blog. I mean who doesn’t have a little morbid curiosity when it comes to our fellow moms?
So, let’s tell it like it really is this week. Most days, I’d like to think that I do have it figured out and under control. I have limited my kid’s playdates and after school activities so I am not racing around like a wild woman. Cooking comes easy to me, so even if I haven’t made it to the market I can usually scrounge up 3 yummy, relatively healthy meals a day. To stay healthy, I either go to a Stroller Strides class or squeeze in a DVD workout while my little one naps. And, I have learned that it’s ok to leave the house with the breakfast dishes in the sink… But then I got the brilliant idea that since things were going along so swimmingly I could start this blog, launch private cooking classes, and train to become a Stroller Strides instructor…while maintaining my large volunteer role with The Tiny Miracles Foundation, my smaller volunteer roles at my son’s school and the raising two little cherubs without any help. And for a while, everything jelled.
Then things started to get a little more chaotic: I’d created a need to be at the computer (writing these blog entries, working out the cooking class curriculum and planning the Stroller Strides workouts) many times when I used to spend time with my children...I frequently heard myself saying “Hang on! I need to take a photo of that for the blog before you eat it!”...People send queries about the cooking classes, but the economy (understandably) holds people back…Mom-a-licious readers ask why I’m not posting more frequently…the New Canaan Rec Dept. reneged their approval for Stroller Strides to offer classes at Waveny Park, dashing—hopefully temporarily?—my goal (and lots of time and money spent training) of bringing these classes to New Canaan…and my little one started giving up his nap (poof, free time gone, just like that).
So here I am sort of back at square one feeling like the balance I had created is woefully off this week. Clearly, I am not going to make a habit of spending my precious free time writing blog entries that dwell on the imbalance of motherhood. But Annie, I have my moments. I may make it seem so carefree and easy, but that is simply because those are the times I choose to focus upon and share in the hopes that a friend (or friend of a friend) will glean an idea or inspiration from that entry. We’re all immersed in poopy diapers, too little sleep, the quandary of whether we should be using our MBAs for "real work"...we bristle when our child chooses the Richard Scarry book off the bookshelf, and most of us don’t get to connect with our husband or friends nearly enough. There’s no point in me writing about that!
I guess the point in me making this reply more public is reassurance that just like you, I find that every month or so I need to prioritize. What makes me feel “mom-a-licious”? What do I need to increase or decrease in my life to be grounded, healthy and happy... a good mom, wife, friend and role model for my kids?
Last week, my dear friend Annie sent me an email saying how much she likes this bog but asking “how do you do it all and make it look so easy…stay so balanced”.
Fast forward to this morning when my older son gave me a handmade card. The card reads:
“107 TO DIY TO MOM HAPPE MUTRS DAY I LOVE YOU DIS WILL TELL YOU HAW MUCH I LOVE YOU” [then there is a chart at the bottom] “NODE: 0…MACING BREKFAS: 2…LEXEO: 5…BING NOS: 100”
For those not versed in reading phonetically, I got a total of 107 points today and this is how the points broke down: 0 points for being naughty (which he defined as yelling at him), 2 points for making breakfast, 5 points for playing a game with him, and 100 points for being nice. There it is. I have been doing too much yelling. Now if that isn’t enough to make you take a step back and evaluate what you’re doing right and what is causing stress in your life, I am not sure what is?
Though I didn’t have time to actually put pen to paper until now, I was going to email Annie back and then I decided that writing an entry here might actually be more helpful/interesting to our broader group of friends who reads this blog. I mean who doesn’t have a little morbid curiosity when it comes to our fellow moms?
So, let’s tell it like it really is this week. Most days, I’d like to think that I do have it figured out and under control. I have limited my kid’s playdates and after school activities so I am not racing around like a wild woman. Cooking comes easy to me, so even if I haven’t made it to the market I can usually scrounge up 3 yummy, relatively healthy meals a day. To stay healthy, I either go to a Stroller Strides class or squeeze in a DVD workout while my little one naps. And, I have learned that it’s ok to leave the house with the breakfast dishes in the sink… But then I got the brilliant idea that since things were going along so swimmingly I could start this blog, launch private cooking classes, and train to become a Stroller Strides instructor…while maintaining my large volunteer role with The Tiny Miracles Foundation, my smaller volunteer roles at my son’s school and the raising two little cherubs without any help. And for a while, everything jelled.
Then things started to get a little more chaotic: I’d created a need to be at the computer (writing these blog entries, working out the cooking class curriculum and planning the Stroller Strides workouts) many times when I used to spend time with my children...I frequently heard myself saying “Hang on! I need to take a photo of that for the blog before you eat it!”...People send queries about the cooking classes, but the economy (understandably) holds people back…Mom-a-licious readers ask why I’m not posting more frequently…the New Canaan Rec Dept. reneged their approval for Stroller Strides to offer classes at Waveny Park, dashing—hopefully temporarily?—my goal (and lots of time and money spent training) of bringing these classes to New Canaan…and my little one started giving up his nap (poof, free time gone, just like that).
So here I am sort of back at square one feeling like the balance I had created is woefully off this week. Clearly, I am not going to make a habit of spending my precious free time writing blog entries that dwell on the imbalance of motherhood. But Annie, I have my moments. I may make it seem so carefree and easy, but that is simply because those are the times I choose to focus upon and share in the hopes that a friend (or friend of a friend) will glean an idea or inspiration from that entry. We’re all immersed in poopy diapers, too little sleep, the quandary of whether we should be using our MBAs for "real work"...we bristle when our child chooses the Richard Scarry book off the bookshelf, and most of us don’t get to connect with our husband or friends nearly enough. There’s no point in me writing about that!
I guess the point in me making this reply more public is reassurance that just like you, I find that every month or so I need to prioritize. What makes me feel “mom-a-licious”? What do I need to increase or decrease in my life to be grounded, healthy and happy... a good mom, wife, friend and role model for my kids?
I found your blog through CT-Moms. Thank you for the second to last paragraph! That's exactly how I feel about the stuff I choose to write about. There are plenty of "mommy blogs" out there lamenting how tough this mothering business is. As you say, we all know about that stuff. We can choose to focus on and celebrate the moments that make it all worth it :)
ReplyDeleteMy life is never predictable...but it sure is good. The spontaneous "I love you mommy"s from the backseat outweigh what sometimes feels mundane (or downright insane)...
ReplyDelete